Blue Velvet Ice
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New poem? "Night-time Fun"? Critique? Improvements?
Night-time fun
Hugged by cocky grass, gazing into black velvet.
Glitter poured into midnight, shining for wishes.
Goddess Luna, on her journey across the sky.
Shining in place of the sun. Heavenly kisses.
Eros tangles the delicate strings of my heart.
Apollo speaks sweet poetry into my ears.
Ceres blows me the kiss of sweet fertility,
And I forget all my silly childhood fears.
The god of wine erases all inhibitions,
And I find myself kissing the man that I love.
My body completely surrendered to moonlight.
Every inch is visible to the night above.
Now I show off my child, my labour of love.
See her beautiful eyes? ice blue, her fathers eyes.
See her nose? She took mine and made it look cuter.
See her hands? They reach for the stars and the skies.
it was fun reading actually ! 
not so sure abt the repetion of "see" in the last three lines but w/e its ur ballad : )
keep writing!!
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